Jasmine Nicole

This blog is my safe space and so I can confidently say that I don’t like to step outside of my comfort zone so this prompt is a little hard for me because I am that person that lives in their comfort zone. I draw clear lines in my life where I know I’ll be comfortable and I avoid crossing them as much as possible. Even then, my comfort zone is quite small and there are very few places where I am 100% comfortable so I’m probably not exaggerating when I say that every time I leave my house, I step outside of my comfort zone.

I have a pattern, and I have found that when I have stepped outside of my comfort zone, it’s usually driven by impulse. I tend to step outside of my comfort zone when I’m riding on a high. It’s high energy that feeds me and gives me the courage to step out of my comfort zone and even then it’s still somewhat safe because I’m feeling good already. So I’ll go out with friends when I planned a night in because I’m caught up in the excitement that everyone else is emitting as they talk about it, or I’ll say something a little crazy in a compelling conversation because I want the attention for a few seconds. It’s always the adrenaline that takes over and before I know it, I’m stepping outside of my comfort zone before I can convince myself otherwise.

Contrary to that fact about myself, the last time I truly stepped out of my comfort zone was the first time I went to therapy. At the time, it was the only thing that I had done that was totally and completely new. What made going to therapy stepping outside of my comfort zone was that I was that person who never asked for help, did everything myself, and took pride in my independence, but that summer I knew I was drowning, and asking for help was the only way to save myself. I knew it was for real because I didn’t let impulse or adrenaline drive me.

I went for two sessions and then I just stopped. I was overwhelmed and afraid of what would happen if I kept going. But it was such a huge step and in taking it, I set into motion a mental health journey that I’m still on, but now I carry less fear in my heart and mind when I approach it. I’ve been in therapy on and off since then.

When I think back to that summer 4 years ago, I feel proud of myself. For me, stepping outside of my comfort zone is extremely hard and evokes feelings of anxiety, but because I took that step a long time ago, I’ve made my life better.